She is Beautiful

She is beautiful.

This was the first thing that came to Farzad’s mind as he saw Zahaa walking towards him. Not towards him specifically but in the same direction. Her hair flying everywhere in the wind. Clad in cream coloured pants and a lilac button down shirt she looked happy. She looked happy talking to the man walking by her side.

Instantly, Farzad’s hands fisted as his jaw clenched. She was happy with someone else!

It was the first time he noticed the man with her. Dressed in formal attire he seemed to be at ease with her as they both walked by him. The sound of her laughter Farzad’s only companion. Slowly he turned around and saw the two of them heading to a car. There was a book in her hands and in the man’s hands too. Heading to the Book Club meet probably.

Suddenly he saw her stiffen as if alarmed and in slow motion he saw her turning towards him as she brought her hair to some semblance. Before she could spot him, Farzad slid inside his car again. He could still see her. Zahaa visibly relaxed and turned back to her companion and shook her head at whatever he asked. Pushing her spectacles up on the bridge of her nose, she slid in the front passenger seat. Of its own accord, his eyes slid to the same seat of his car. The empty seat of his car.

As he sat in front of the steering wheel contemplating what could have been, he registered the other car driving away. Taking away the girl he loved. The girl who had once loved him.

Releasing an audible sigh, he closed his eyes and leaned back in the seat; no comfort to be found.

“I can’t do this.” He muttered and started the engine of his own car, forgoing a job interview that could have taken him places. He simply did not have it in him to work with her and know that she was someone else’s. And all because he had been a fool who had believed that a relationship with her would have chained him.

He had stupidly believed that she would be there when he was ready and done with playing the field. Patiently waiting for him. What he should have realised, he scolded himself, was that she would never have trusted him after that incident. He should have known and not taken such a gamble with his life. His happiness.

And now, he thought driving on the almost empty streets, here I am; knowing that I love her but she has moved on. Almost a year on since she broke up with me.

Sending up a prayer for her happiness, he decided in that moment that if he ever moved on from Zahaa and fell in love again, he would make sure that he is audible about his emotions and secure in what he feels.

Maybe one day, a resigned sigh left his mouth and he drove on.

 

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The picture that goes with the post was Googled and downloaded from http://www.fanpop.com